Silver Mystic #7 - Secrets (READ THIS ONE)
Anonymity, and why I care about it. This is important.
Before we get any further, I feel like I should tell you. Loren Andrews isn’t my legal name.
I know, shocking. Nobody could have ever seen this coming when most of you know me in real life and I have been open about the fact that I was going to write under a pen name. But I’m glad we could get this out in the open. Now that it’s out of the way, let’s talk about why, shall we?
Reason #1 - Aesthetic
Aesthetic is a big part of my creative process. This expresses itself in many, many ways. Here is a non-exhaustive list:
The type of word processing software I use (and which colors I write in)
What my writing background is (the full moon, currently)
What music is playing when I write vs when I edit (yes, it’s different)
Which words I choose (lol obviously)
How many chapters there are (for real, when this is published, please see if you can identify the pattern)
How the cover art should look (thanks Nic!)
What name is on the cover (oh look, the topic of this email finally)
If you have questions about any of those, feel free to shoot me an email reply and I’ll expand, but for the moment I assume it’s boring. Besides, I HAVE TO GET TO THE POINT.
That last one, which name is on the cover. I won’t go into too much detail here, but I’ve never considered my legal name appealing aesthetically. No offense Mom and Dad, but really I don’t have to worry about offending you because you didn’t choose my surname either (I like my first name, it’s dandy, so good job). So with this, I get to decide. And I’ve decided Loren Andrews is aesthetically pretty great. If you don’t think so, I don’t care, because this isn’t your book (please still love me).
Reason #2 - Ambiguity
One of the reasons why I landed on Loren Andrews (after many, many ideas) is because it’s somewhat ambiguous. At least when it comes to gender. To be very very clear, I don’t want that to be misinterpreted as me trying to be a gender I am not. The point is simply to add possibility.
You may have noticed the profile picture I’ve selected. That’s not me, by the way. It’s a public-use photo, and I chose it in part because it’s somewhat androgynous and mysterious. Not because I’m trying to be overly-dramatic (who, me?), but because I’m trying to take myself out of the equation a bit.
When people read my writing, I’d rather they were not thinking of me.
In my mind, a writer doesn’t exist, only the story matters. Yes, I understand the importance of context, I just don’t care. Well, that’s not actually true at all. I love context. I think it’s very important. But I happen to think that it doesn’t, or shouldn’t matter with what I’ve written. At least not yet. I want the story to stand alone.
In order to achieve a copyright, I have to include some publicly accessible information, like an address. A P.O. Box is great, but doesn’t hide my general location. I’m in the heart of the United States, no way of getting around that. So location is out of my control, and with it, a myriad of cultural nuance. So really, gender and race were the only things I had a modicum amount of power over, and I used them.
Loren Andrews is about the most white-bread name I can imagine, but that doesn’t mean it has to be white. And while Loren is the masculine historically (Lauren is the feminine FYI), it’s been pretty inconsistent in the past several decades. Could go either way, really.
But ultimately, I chose something that was easily forgettable while instantly recognizable. Or so I hope. It’s plain, but not without trimming. Hopefully people forget it while they’re reading, and remember it long after.
Reason #3 - The Ability to be Invisible
Here we have arrived at my final, and most important reason for publishing under a pen name (finally, amirite). This part is really important to me, especially if you know me in real life. Hold up, lemme make sure that comes across.
THIS PART IS REALLY IMPORTANT
Now, I’m under no illusion that I’m the next J.K. Rowling or Stephen King. I mean, I wouldn’t be angry about it, but c’mon. Those are once-in-a-generation writers. I’d love to be successful, but I’m not going to be a billionaire. Probably.
Even so, I am somewhat afraid of the spotlight. Not because I’m modest and humble, because I am definitely not. I’m like a B+ narcissist, being real. Not enough to really gain that much attention, but enough to put me solidly in a certain category. I know you all already know this because you’ve been reading my emails. Have I asked you to tell me I’m pretty lately?
Obviously I enjoy a certain amount of attention and popularity, public adulation, heartfelt praise, the cries of adoration… where was I? Oh right, while I like that to a degree, I have also seen how it can spiral out of control into something unhealthy. Not with me, at least not yet, but I’ve seen it. I don’t want that.
What do I want?
I want my book(s) to resonate. I want my writing to make people feel, and think, and do. What I don’t want is for my writing to inspire people to stalk. Again, I’m not trying to make this sound like I’m assuming I’m going to be some big famous writer-person, but I do want to guard against popularity by having some measure of distance between myself as a distinct unique person, and myself as a writer.
The totality of myself is not as a fiction writer. It’s not as any of the dozen or more roles I’ve established by now. So I don’t want any success of my fiction to overshadow the other things I am, if that makes sense.
And just in the off chance that this stuff really is wildly successful, I’d like a little shield. Can’t hurt, right?
Okay but, is that realistic?
Y’all tired of that gif yet? Cuz I am definitely not. So get used to it.
Anonymity is great, but being realistic, too many people know me (my legal name me), the name of my book, etc. for me to actually expect to be completely anonymous forever. That said, I still hope to achieve at least a small measure of distance between me, myself, and Loren.
This is where I need your help
Most of the people on this newsletter currently know who I am. Soon, I will be publishing my work for the whole world to see. I love that you like what I’ve done, and/or want to support me. LOVE. All caps, bold, italics. I have said it over and over, but it won’t get old, so I’ll say it again.
I love you for supporting me in this. I cannot thank you enough. It means so much.*
*If it’s not too much trouble, I’d really appreciate it if you didn’t go out of your way to link my pen name to my legal name, or defining characteristics.
Don’t overthink it, and don’t feel like you bear the burden of my privacy. But it’s just a guiding rule, on the eve of my publishing. If you have any questions about what this means, please feel free to email me.
Oh, did you notice that I said “on the eve of my publishing”? Yes, that means I plan to publish tomorrow.
T-O-M-O-R-R-O-W
Ready? Cuz I’m not.
Thanks again for reading. These are so long, and I never proofread them (lol I lied, I proofread it), so I’m amazed any of you are still opening. But thanks. I love you for supporting me in this. I cannot thank you enough. It means so much.
With bold, italicized, all caps LOVE,
Loren
P.S. Even though I did proofread, I still had a couple errors. Fixed them. Teehee.